Feeling Loved vs. Loveable

Love...
It's such a loaded word. Yet it is something everyone craves.
Love...
Is it a feeling? a choice? an action? Some inevitable force that hits you by accident or some divine intervention?
We all desire to be loved, to be wanted, desired, chosen. We want to be seen, heard, fully known... and accepted as we are. Yet so many of us shy away from affection, hide our true selves, put forth facades and acts in hopes of attracting someone who'll stick around long enough to make us feel good. If that can be achieved, many still panic when things get "too close", "too real", or "too serious". Even when we've been chosen as the object of affection, we become afraid that our true nature, our deepest selves will be rejected. In spite of the obvious attention and perhaps even declarations of love, we feel unlovable.
If he/she REALLY knew who/what I was, she/he would stop loving me, or leave me, or regret our time together.
One of the best quotes I know is from "Perks of Being a Wallflower":
     "We accept the love we think we deserve."
Somewhere in our lifetimes, no matter how short or long, we have encountered experiences that have shaped our mentalities into believing we are unlovable:
 - I'm not interesting enough
 - I'm not pretty enough
 - I'm not worth knowing
 - I have nothing to offer
 - I'm not smart enough
 - I've done things I regret
 - I've done things I can't forgive myself for
 - I can't measure up
These lies plague our minds. We believe them. We even understand them. We see ourselves and judge harshly. We see our flaws and can't comprehend how anyone can see past them. Whether we've been told this by those around us, those we love and trust, or whether we have devised these words up on our own behalf/to our own detriment, we cling to them. They become us. We let them define who we are and start building walls to hide ourselves away, never fully relaxing, never fully confident. Never fully at peace with myself, alone or in a crowd.
Sometimes this is portrayed with bravado, sometimes with panic or avoidance.
And it hits all ages, sexes, shapes and sizes. The grass is NEVER greener.
Those who are seen-from-across-the-room sexy believe they can never be loved for anything but their bodies. They are desperate to be known for who they are on the inside.
       "Stick around long enough to know me! Stop expecting me to give you what you see!"
Those who are outside Vogue's standards of beauty believe they can never be loved for their appearance. They are desperate to be seen as beautiful.
       "Tell me I'm desirable! Want me for more than my intellect/aptitude!"
Love is a tricky thing to give and to receive. It is a balance of self-worth...
 - I AM worth knowing and being loved.
 - I DO have something to offer another.
...and trust.
Love is difficult. It requires choosing to put another's needs before your own. It requires choosing to be vulnerable and letting someone else know your deep dark secrets: those things you regret, the hair you pluck, the things you hate and love about yourself, your hopes and dreams, your deepest fears. You are choosing to move forward in relationship, true companionship with another human being, whether it be in friendship or romance.